“The difference between having an affirming parent and a rejecting parent is huge,” Caitlin Ryan, director of the Family Acceptance Project, told me. According to research by the Family Acceptance Project at San Francisco State University, even a moderate level of what’s called “rejecting behavior” from parents - like refusing to use a new name or pronouns or mocking a child’s identity - can accompany a tripled risk of depression and a doubled risk of suicidal thoughts and attempts in queer children. ![]() But, of course, it doesn’t always work that way - often with tragic consequences. It may seem logical that learning a child is queer would drive parents to question received anti-LGBTQ beliefs, even those enforced through the dual spiritual and social pressures of a conservative church. “I had no one to talk to.” The group supported her as she left the church. “I don’t know what I would’ve done” without the Mama Bears, Pierce told me. When her son Jonathon came out as bisexual in 2018 (he now identifies as pansexual), she joined the Mama Bears and found life-changing support. Although she’d had gay and lesbian friends, the church’s teachings on LGBTQ people mostly passed by her unnoticed. She grew up in the Lutheran Church-Missouri Synod, a conservative denomination that views homosexuality as sinful. ![]() Pierce’s journey to this hug was not simple. ![]() After a startled moment, Veil closes their eyes, leans a cheek sideways on Pierce’s shoulder and just rests there for a long, quiet time. (Veil also asked that their full name not be used.) Pierce steps into the embrace wholeheartedly, flinging her arms around Veil’s back. A powerful gay activist, a rural conservative town and a civil rights debate that won’t endĬhristina Pierce, an occupational therapist from outside of Dallas with loose red hair and an exuberant smile, shows up to the Mama Bears booth wearing a large button reading “BAD THEOLOGY KILLS.” Her first hug of the day is for an 18-year-old wearing a floral shirt who gives their name as Veil.
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